Virginia is a Small Town, 1988

I met Jim Beck at Old Dominion University in 1988; after thirty+ years of friendship and marriage, he still makes me smile at the drop of a dime.

I had just broken up with some W&L boy and sworn off all men (like that was ever going to last). My oldest friend, Michele Gebler Hackworth, planted my little pitiful self at the ATO table while she went for drinks. Jim must have been the brother who lost a bet because when he sat next to me - there was a definite exit strategy. He made me laugh about something - who knows what - and later we were sitting on the lawn listening to Speidel, Goodrich, Groggin & Lille (takes ya’ll back huh?). I swear it felt like I had known him forever. I thought: ok, handsome like a rascal, notkillherthrowherinthewoods, and music - this might work out.

That first fraternity party - dear lord! What did I know about fraternity parties? Well, too much to be honest and all ending with some near escape from the law through a window. It turned out to be a great night - no window exit needed. I met brother John Hogan first and he really piqued my interest. There was something about his southern drawl and easy charm - did I know him? As I’m tryin’ to figure this Hogan character out, another brother blasts through the door jumping clear over the counter! His landing game needed some work but it made me scream/laugh. After the shock of his entrance, and epic fail, I was introduced to Chigger Carmine; again, that feeling of recognition playin’ through my memory - but where? There was something special about these two - I just needed to figure it out.

So, bein’ that we’re Virginians, and having never met a stranger, the “What?! You’re from Virginia? Do you know...” conversation begins. It hits like a shot of lightnin’, “Gloucester?! I have family in Gloucester.” A split hair later, and in true Virginian fashion, the family connections are made between the Carmines, Hogans, Williams and Plummers. Virginia is a very small town.

The most fun was when the last brother entering the room. Keenan Torrans, as big as life, devilish, loud and wonderful. I had known Kennan through high school and he was one of my favorite people. Again, the Virginia Connection leaves the station and Jim is a spectator as his closest brothers and I discover our connections to one another. Lord knows what Jim was thinking! I know what I was thinking: good people.

Over the years, our friends have spread out, our lives have changed, different paths were taken, there have been moments of celebrations and grief - life happens. What remains unchanged is learning to adjust our sails and the knowledge that these friendships are a pure gift.

Side Note: Jim and I have found three separate occasions where our lives have lined up without us knowing: a judge, Girl Scout Camp, and Covesville. Sometimes, fate just takes over and sits your rump in one place while the other is dared into talking to you.